Becoming Paula
Keywords: Paula, Becoming,
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I work in an office with 15 coworkers about 11 of them are women. I get along well with my coworkers and go out of my way to be helpful. I find it is more fun to work with friends than to work with strangers. My name is Paul and I work in an insurance claims office processing claims and making recommendations for our supervisor who signs off on the claims. In the office I am well respected and enjoy my coworker"s support. There is nothing I would not do for the people I work with. I also help my coworkers with their workloads when we are swamped, as I am a fast, accurate worker. I only wish that support extended to my life away from work.
I am basically a lonely guy once I leave the office. I can"t seem to impress women with my masculinity. I am 25, 5" 4' and about 115lbs with dark auburn hair and green eyes and I don"t cut a dashing figure, my voice even betrays me. My coworkers are more likely to refer to me as somewhat pretty, rather than handsome or dashing.
The "girls" as I call them at work often lunch with me. It is hard to believe but they treat me like one of the girls, and they involve me in their "girl talk." You know what I mean they talk about clothes, makeup, sex and guys around me they will even elicit my opinions, but let some other guy sit down with us and the timbre of their conversation changes. They are more than somewhat protective of me from guys who use to poke fun at me. There is even a mother figure named Ginny, we all love her, she is about 38, and leads the "girls" in an assault against anybody who would torment any of us. She has read the company harassment riot act many times. Things settled down since I have proven my value and gained their respect or at least they fear the wrath of Ginny.
Our supervisor Charles encourages us to get to know each other when times are slow and anytime we are on break. The "girls" would often ask about how I was doing, my love life and family and such. It was easier for me to smile and lie saying things were great, and such.
Come 5:00 p.m. though I have to face the world and leave the protective environment of my office. I have tried dating services and singles bars. Nowadays I just save my money and drink at home, not that I drink all that much. In my off times, I often go to the mall and just walk, just to be around people. I have found that there are a lot of people doing just the same thing.
Things began to change though, when I was at the Mall one Saturday afternoon. I had stopped outside on shops and looked up at the mannequins in the window, not really seeing but just out of rote. That is when I heard, "Oh Paul" called out. I turned and saw Ginny and two of the "girls" Barbra and Rachel come rushing to me. I waved at them and we exchanged hugs all around. They asked what I was up too and I said just walking around, getting a little exercise. Rachel jumped in and asked if I was window shopping. I said yes. I do a lot of that.
Barbra said, "oh really I bet you would look good in that."
All three of the girls were giggling at that comment, and I was stumped until I turned around and saw that it was a dress shop we were standing outside of. I must have turned ten shades of red and I started to turn to escape but was caught by both arms and the girls said we were just kidding Paul, chill out dude.
Ginny said, "why don"t you come with us Paul."
In this matter I didn"t feel I had any say in, because I was just whisked away arm in arm between Barbra and Rachel. They pulled me into the dress shop we were outside of they were like a pack of wolves circling carrion looking for the right morsel to eat. They picked several outfits each and left three purses on my arms as they went to the dressing rooms. They would model them for me then change and come out. This went on from store to store. I was even dragged into a lingerie store. They asked me what I thought about this and what I thought about that, luckily, they didn"t come out to model for me. I noticed that I got a lot of stares from the patrons there, especially since I had three purses on my arms. I wouldn"t admit it to them but I was enjoying being with them.
After about three or four more stores and carrying several bags for the girls, we wound up in one of the restaurants in the mall. I helped the girls with their chairs I really think they would have stood there till I did. They all three were looking at me as we began talking. Talking, they were grilling me. They asked why I was at the mall. I tried lying to them but they didn"t buy it. I finally broke down and told them I came there to be around people and that this is the type of thing I do with my free time. I told them that I had not had a date in three years and it was either hang here or hang at home.
Then I broke down and told them my whole story. When I first stated school, I was tall for my age. I was nearly 5 feet by the end of the second grade but my growth slowed down and even the girls started out growing me. From the third grade through high school, I grew a little more than 4". I was never very athletic, I didn"t run well, throw, or any of the things boys did. I was teased about my size and called sissy, fag and such. Even some of the teachers treated me poorly, but there were some teachers who were like Ginny who would look out for me without my asking, and some of the girls my age would also look out for me.
College wasn"t much better but there wasn"t as much physical harassment. I admitted that I couldn"t even get a date from the less attractive girls. If I had been a girl, I would have been a pretty girl. The only date I had during college was with Carla, a confirmed Lesbian. Carla was the masculine partner and I dressed as a girl the feminine partner, for a Halloween party for her sorority and nobody figured out I was a guy. Carla made a convincing guy and I made an even more convincing girl. The girls in the sorority liked me. When they weren"t hunting studs, they would hang around me. I was even asked if I would be interested in pledging the next semester (This broke up Barbra, Rachel and Ginny till they saw my reaction). That was my date"s joke on them. While I was dressed up Carla and I would make out, but just like Cinderella, at the stroke of midnight I turned back into Paul and she acted like she didn"t know me.
I hadn"t noticed but the tea we had for dinner had been replaced with Margaritas. I was on my third when I finished my story. I didn"t know why I had said so much, it was like a dam had broken and the girls had been so attentive while I talked.
Ginny broke the silence and said, "you really would have made a very pretty girl, I just love your face and eyes, what eyelashes you have. You were really invited to pledge that sorority?"
I said, "yeah one of the members even called me after they learned about the deception and asked me to think it over, but I think it was just to tease me. I am trusting you with this story please don"t hurt me with it."
Barbra spoke up, "we would never do that to a friend and believe us we are your friends. Have you ever thought about becoming a woman?"
My face must have turned crimson. I could feel my face flush with heat.
Barbra saw my discomfort and said, "I am sorry Paul, please forgive me for asking. It"s just you seem so feminine at times and we are comfortable around you, it"s like your one of us."
"I like all of you and there is nothing that will change that," I said.
They giggled and looked at each other in a knowing manner. "We think you are a great guy to Paul, we enjoy working with you," Rachel said, Barbra and Ginny agreed.
Ginny spoke up and said, "I don"t know about you girls but it is getting time for me to go."
I picked up the tab for the girls, which I got a round of hugs and kisses and they got up and left. I was left wondering where all I could not believe I had talked so much. I have never told anybody, so much about me. I was afraid it would come back and haunt me, but I trusted them and hoped that they would not hurt me. At the same time it felt good finding someone to listen to me and seemed to care about what I felt.
Sunday came and went and soon it was time for work again. I arrived at work and it was like the previous week. The "girls" were no different from before and I was glad and it was good being at work. On Wednesday Sharon another of the girls came by and asked me if I would like to join a few of our coworkers for drinks on Friday after work.
I said that, "I should be able to make it." I have gone out with them drinking on Fridays before it was no big deal. It was a labor day weekend and we were closed on Monday and I didn"t want to be alone on the start of it.
Friday came and the day just flew and we were headed to the local watering hole.
Sharon said, "I took the bus Paul, I was wondering if I could ride with you?"
I told her, "I would be happy to give you a ride and glad for the company."
When we got to the bar there were about ten people from our department there. I didn"t drink much seeing that I would be driving Sharon and myself home. After a couple of hours the crowd from work was dwindling down until it was just Sharon and I.
We left at 10:00 p.m. and I drove her home. I parked outside her place and she asked if I would walk her to her door, there had been some late night assaults in the area. When we got to her door, she invited me in for coffee. I thought that this was my lucky day, I had not thought of Sharon as a possible date, but my prospects were looking up. Inside she led me to her kitchen and started a pot of coffee.
Sharon said, "I will be right back, I need to visit the lady"s room."
I sat at the breakfast bar and watched the pot perking. Then I heard feet coming back to me. I turned and there she was standing there with about seven other girls from work.
I could not but wonder what was going on. I honestly nearly wet my pants, behind Sharon were Barbra, Rachel, Ginny, Peggy, Donna, Marcy, and Carol.
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Keywords: Paula, Becoming,